Even in the earliest memories of my childhood, I remember writing.
I remember sitting in front of the computer in our guest bedroom, typing away for hours on end to finish the story I was working on. I remember the files upon files of stories I started and never finished — all of the half-baked ideas and half-baked characters. I remember the familiar satisfaction I felt as the words flowed out of me, a feeling that still fills me with joy even years later. I remember it all. For me, writing has been a constant in my life, one that has waxed and waned through the years as life has grown busier, but has never quite disappeared.
Yet when I think back on the first thing I ever wrote, it was not an original story. It did not exist in its own universe or have its own set of unique characters and plotlines. No … the first thing I ever wrote was very much Harry Potter fanfiction. Is that embarrassing to admit? Yes. But it does not change the fact that when the idea of building my own world with my own characters seemed a tad too daunting, I turned to fanfiction to develop my writing skills and style, and I do not regret it. In fact, fanfiction is likely one of the main reasons I am sitting here right now, writing this article you’re currently reading. It was a crucial starting point, one that would open my eyes to the wonder of writing fiction and set me off on a journey that would eventually lead me to major in creative writing. It was a “first” in my life that was intrinsic to who I have become. In a funny way, I am forever indebted to fanfiction.
For those unfamiliar with the concept, fanfiction consists of stories about popular characters and series, written entirely by devoted fans eager to try their hand at writing about their favorite characters. Over the past several decades, fanfiction has exploded across the internet, filling entire websites with stories about quite literally anything you could think of. Many see it as nothing more than a useless pastime for crazy fangirls, but for others — myself included — it has served an entirely different purpose. For me, it was a generous source of comfort and inspiration, one that has helped to mold me into the writer I am today.
Of course, I didn’t start off with fanfiction by writing it. My journey began on some late night in middle school, lying awake in my bed and scrolling through my phone as I searched for a remedy for that aching emptiness I always felt after finishing a new book series, TV show or movie: the yearning for more of that story and its characters when there wasn’t another chapter to read or another episode to watch. It was in those moments, tucked warmly beneath my comforter, that I stumbled upon fanfiction.net, Wattpad and finally Archive of Our Own — all hubs for fanfiction readers and writers. Before I knew it, I had fallen down the rabbit hole, overjoyed to finally have found something that would sustain me even after the story was over.
From the first fanfiction I clicked on, I was hooked. Even if the writing was horrible — which, if you’ve ever perused any of these fanfiction sites before, you’ll know it is more often than not — I couldn’t help but be amazed by how many writers there were, all writing about different stories and characters, and all willing to be vulnerable and put their work out there, for free. Even though most of them were anonymous, it felt as though they weren’t too different from me: a new writer, anxious to get their words out there for the world to read. Before I knew it, I was inspired to try it out myself, to dip my toe in other people’s stories and characters to help gain confidence in my own writing and convince myself that I did in fact have something to say.
And so, that’s exactly what I did. I started writing fanfiction for my favorite childhood stories — Harry Potter, Percy Jackson and more — and I soon discovered that writing was not just something I could do in my free time, but something that I felt good doing and could love. Fanfiction had opened the door to a world of infinite possibilities and never-ending stories. I no longer needed to bid farewell to the characters I loved, but instead could tuck them away and pull them back out anytime I pleased. I could even write about them myself if I wanted, putting them in whatever crazy situation I desired. I was given the room that I needed to grow and develop as a writer, while still having a safety net made up of other people’s characters and stories to fall back on. It was not only a source of comfort and happiness, but also a free learning tool, one that I will be forever grateful for.
As it turns out, I was not alone in feeling this way. There are a whole host of incredibly successful authors who started off by writing fanfiction as well. Victoria Aveyard — author of the bestselling young adult series “Red Queen” — not only reads fanfiction, but admits to having written it as a young writer. She has said that fanfiction was crucial to her development as a writer and that she would not be in the position she was in today without it. Marissa Meyer, author of the popular young adult Cinderella retelling, “Cinder,” has also talked about writing fanfiction, and even offered up her fanfiction profile for fans to read. Christina Lauren, Cassandra Clare and Rainbow Rowell are just a few of the many others who have also said that their journey as writers began with reading and writing fanfiction. For them, it was a crucial “first” that led them to where they are today. They are also, in a funny way, indebted to the world of fanfiction.
This is one of the main reasons why I love fanfiction so dearly and will quite literally defend it with my life: It helps create new writers, giving them their first chances to share their words with the world, every single day. It’s for this exact reason that — even after I’ve largely moved on from just writing fanfiction and am much more comfortable exploring my own characters and storylines — I will probably still read and write it for the rest of my life. Not only has it helped me to harness my own writing style, but it’s also a source of never-ending inspiration. I sometimes even imagine that, as I’m in my bed scrolling through Archive of Our Own, I’m reading a future bestselling author’s story, and who knows? It could be true. If fanfiction was such a crucial “first” for so many wildly successful authors, who’s to say that the other dedicated writers out there who are giving their blood, sweat and tears to these stories and their readers aren’t heading down the same path? Odds are, there are at least a handful of fanfiction writers out there who will one day publish a very successful novel. I’ve even hoped that the writers of the fanfictions I love do one day publish a book so that I can read their words again and continue to learn from them.
So, if you ever find yourself on the verge of dismissing or making fun of fanfiction, try to at least consider just how important those troves of online stories are for so many people. Everyone has to start somewhere as a writer, and if that means the first story you ever publish is on fanfiction.net, then so be it.
Daily Arts Writer Rebecca Smith can be reached at rebash@umich.edu