5. Sean Paul and Sting — The former Police frontman
is about as close to super-human as you can get. From his
unshakably firm grasp on rainforest politics to his pioneering, and
often unpleasantly odd, musical experimentation, he can regulate
just about any domain. Any domain, that is, except for duets with
Sean Paul. The performance will inspire some good laughs, but Sting
should never again allow himself to be seduced by a whack
rapper.

Mira Levitan

4. Sean Paul and Sting — The former Police frontman
is about as close to super-human as you can get. From his
unshakably firm grasp on rainforest politics to his pioneering, and
often unpleasantly odd, musical experimentation, he can regulate
just about any domain. Any domain, that is, except for duets with
Sean Paul. The performance will inspire some good laughs, but Sting
should never again allow himself to be seduced by a whack
rapper.

3. 50 Cent — 50 deserves a shout-out for his
overwhelming confidence … best exhibited by his stroll onto stage
when he hadn’t in fact won an award.

2. Robert Randolph — A viable contender for future
bearer of George Clinton’s groove torch, Randolph sported a
suit embroidered with NBA graphics, perhaps the coolest formal
threads ever donned for an awards show.

1. George Clinton — Kudos to the father of funk for
foolishly getting arrested for cocaine possession, wisely using his
Grammy performance as a get-out-of-jail-free card and croakily
performing his greatest hits with the rag-tag Parliament.

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