Double cock punch for ‘Matrix’ co-director – According to CNN.com, a Los Angeles Superior Court judge has frozen the assets of Larry Wachowski, one half of the brother duo behind the “Matrix” franchise, in an effort to determine his net worth in the midst of a bitter divorce battle with his estranged wife, Thea Bloom.

J. Brady McCollough
J. Brady McCollough

Bloom claims that Wachowski has been concealing funds that should have been deposited in joint accounts as per their separation agreement.

If that’s not bad enough, “The Matrix Reloaded” took a blow at the box office in just its second weekend, being out-earned by “Bruce Almighty” by a margin of over $30 million. The total gross for “Reloaded” currently stands at just over $200 million. Do you really want to live in a world in which a movie earning $200 million in two weeks is considered a failure? I know I don’t.

Wachowski and his brother Andy stand to make 5 percent of the gross earnings of “The Matrix Reloaded” and “The Matrix Revolutions,” which is due out in November. In addition, licensing deals for video games like “Enter the Matrix” will likely earn the pair additional millions.

But until the dispute is resolved and his assets are unfrozen, Larry ain’t gettin’ shit.

Back in the USSR, except it’s his first time, and it’s no longer the USSR – Sir Paul McCartney, formerly known as the cute one in a certain Liverpool rock and roll combo, finally got around to making his live debut on Russian soil, playing in Moscow’s famous Red Square last Saturday night before a crowd of over 20,000 people. Tickets were reported by CNN.com as going for well over $300.

The pricey seats didn’t keep away former Soviet President Mikhail Gorbachev and current Russian President Vladimir Putin from attending (the semi-rotting corpse of Lenin was of course also on hand for the festivities). Sir Paul gave private audience to both leaders and also played “She’s Leaving Home” and “Two of Us,” two Beatle tracks never performed live by Mac until his current tour.

Speaking from hell, Richard Nixon felt a small twinge of satisfaction that his belief that McCartney was really “nothing but a goddamn Red” had finally been verified.

Running away from cops while high on PCP no longer a crime in South Carolina – MSNBC.com reported that James Brown, also known as Soul Brother Number One, the Hardest Working Man in Show Business and Inmate #24601, was recently pardoned of all crimes by a South Carolina parole board.

The ordeal began in 1988, when Brown invaded an insurance seminar in an Augusta, Ga., office while high on PCP and toting a shotgun. Supposedly, he was upset that seminar goers were using his private restroom. Brown proceeded to lead police on a chase from Georgia to South Carolina and back before police shot out his tires.

The Godfather of Soul served 15 months of a six-year sentence in the early ’90s after being convicted of assault, drug possession, resisting arrest and carrying a pistol.

The pardon frees Brown from all legal consequences stemming from the conviction. After the pardon was announced, Brown celebrated by treating the parole board to an undoubtedly soulful version of “God Bless America.”

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *