Figures in millions of dollars.

1. Monsters Inc. (62.6) This much dough opening week and Lynch doesn”t even appear on the chart? Eisner, Lucifer is coming for your soul.

2. The One (19.1) Just like “The Matrix,” only the star of this waste of time speaks better English than Neo.

3. Domestic Disturbance (14.0) In the preview, it looks like Vinnie is punching me!

4. K-PAX (10.1) I liked this movie the first time I saw it when it was called “Killer Clowns from Outer Space.”

5. 13 Ghosts (7.9) When you remake a really bad movie, you should at least make Shannon Elizabeth take off her shirt.

6. Riding in Cars With Boys (4.1) I can”t wait for “Charlie”s Angels 2” and the downfall of Western society, which should be concurrent.

7. From Hell (6.0) Well, it”s not where we came from, it probably is where we are going.

8. Training Day (3.0) I have to train myself to think of some new jokes for this one.

9. Bandits (2.8) Blanchett, from oscar nominated actor to cheap American accents and Billy-Bob in a Neil Young wig. She”s not allowed back in England.

10. Serendipity (2.4) If romantic comedies were STDs, this flick would be genital warts.

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published.