Spring Break is coming in a few short days, and if you’re anything like my housemates and me, you still have no plans.

Luckily, the Michigan Athletic Department has your back. It turns out that a week of driving around the country following Michigan sports teams could turn into a pretty good trip.

Day 1:

While you’re stuck in town Thursday night waiting for your one friend who has a Friday class, check out the Big Ten Women’s Swimming and Diving Championships at Canham Natatorium (next to the IM Building).

Canham is heated to feel like a tropical island, so it’s practically the same thing as the Caribbean. Also, watching the 10-meter platform diving isn’t all that different from cliff jumping in Jamaica.

Day 2:

Friday afternoon, head south to Columbus to take in a Michigan hockey game against Ohio State. Walking up and down High Street always feels like Spring Break — if you normally end up fearing for your life in a cold-weather climate for vacation.

Day 3:

Now, we head into the best stretch of your Michigan sports road trip. From Columbus, start driving south. You need to make it to Tallahassee, Fla., by 10 a.m. on Saturday. Google Maps says it should only take about 13 hours, so leave straight from the hockey game and don’t stop driving, not even for bathroom breaks.

If you follow these instructions, you should reach the Florida State campus in time for the Michigan softball team’s game against East Carolina.

Day 4:

It’s a shorter trip today, driving south to St. Petersburg to watch the Michigan baseball team play St. John’s at 1 p.m. Nothing says Spring Break like baseball. What’s the difference between Spring Break and spring training? Just one word.

The game should be over by the late afternoon, so take the rest of the day to check out some of the great sights in the St. Petersburg/Tampa area. I won’t pretend to know what any of those are, but I’m sure you can find them.

Day 5:

Congratulations, Michigan Athletic Department, you’ve ruined this trip by not having any teams scheduled to play on Monday, Feb. 23. Well, you’re already in Florida, so there’s just one thing to do: Disney World.

The “most magical place on Earth” is less than two hours away. There will probably be tons of Wolverine fans and alums at Disney World. Of course, most of them will be there with their small children.

Day 6:

Now, you have to make a choice. You could head back to Tallahassee for another Michigan softball game, or you could get a head start on the trip south for the women’s tennis match against Miami on Thursday.

If you really like softball, go for it. But two days on South Beach, plus a tennis match — you can’t go wrong.

The rest of the trip will probably be a haze once you get to Miami. Crazy stuff happens there. Be safe, and don’t forget to make it to the tennis match. Remember that you have to be back in class on Monday and it takes about 21 hours to get back to Ann Arbor from Miami.

And if you’re still looking for some Michigan sports teams to watch on your way home, you might want to swing by Bloomington for the women’s track and field Big Ten Indoor Championships.

By the time you get back to Ann Arbor, you will have driven for about two days total.

And you’ll probably have seen more non-revenue Michigan sports in one week than most students will in four years.

It should be fun.

— If anyone actually attempts this trip, Sandals would like to hear about it. He can be reached at nsandals@umich.edu.

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