The Michigan Daily: Hi, is George there?
Random: Yeah. This is him.
TMD: Hey, my name is Graham and I’m from The Michigan Daily. I’m doing the Random Student Interview, would you be willing to help me out?
R: Yeah sure.
TMD: How was your spring break?
R: Not too bad. Pretty uneventful.
TMD: Do you know anyone who took part in any wet T-shirt contests?
R: No.
TMD: Say we were British, thus speaking like the Brits do, and I asked you if you pulled over Spring Break. What do you think that would mean?
R: Maybe it means, if I traveled out of the country.
TMD: It actually means to get some ass. So, did you pull over break?
R: No.
TMD: What does the term sex kitten really mean?
R: I don’t know, maybe it’s a term for a woman’s vagina?
TMD: I was thinking it meant a really frisky girl.
R: That would be a valid way to think of it.
TMD: But I don’t really know, but for the purpose of this interview, let’s pretend that it means a horny, frisky girl. Have you ever dated a sex kitten?
R: No, but that would be cool.
TMD: What is the sexiest kitten, in your opinion? Now we are talking cats.
R: Dude, I don’t know. Like a feline, the animal? Just make up something and say I said it.
TMD: Is it uncomfortable to watch videos of animals having sex in class?
R: I would say so, yeah.
TMD: I just watched such a video in class. Crazy that that’s educational, isn’t it?
R: That’s pretty strange. Just watching animals have sex seems pretty fucked up.
TMD: But it’s educational.
R: I guess you can get some knowledge out of it, but it should be optional.
TMD: So I’ve been watching a lot of dating shows on television because I find them hilariously entertaining. Would you ever take part on a dating-game show?
R: Not really. The whole “Joe Millionaire” thing and “The Bachelorette” don’t interest me.
TMD: I think you’re watching the high brow stuff. I’m talking about the half-hour shows on WGN.
R: I’ve never really seen that stuff.
TMD: Now at the beginning, the contestants always introduce themselves and give a little spiel about who they are. What would your two minute introduction be?
R: I’m looking for a sex kitten, with a good sense of humor. Glasses wouldn’t be bad.
TMD: Glasses?
R: I have a thing for women with glasses.
TMD: What does it say about our society that FOX is even doing this “Married In America” show, where people can call in and tell two people to get married?
R: I think it kind of sucks. People don’t take marriage seriously anymore. That kind of sucks, and divorce rates are extremely high, which isn’t cool.
TMD: Does it mean that we are really poor at finding the right partner? Or is this progress, that we now have ways of finding the right person for us?
R: I don’t think it’s necessarily progress.The good old fashioned style of eventually meeting someone seems to be a good way. I think it just sells.
TMD: Is it a fantasy for you to someday hook up with someone from your high school, like at a five year reunion or something?
R: Not really.
TMD: Really? No women left unconquered back at high school? You really went through them all?
R: Well, possibly one.
TMD: What’s the girl’s name?
R: Uh, no one in particular.
TMD: If the university offered degrees like rock star and porn star, would you double major to become a rock star/porn star?
R: Not at all. Porn star thing would have been really cool back in ninth grade. But I don’t think I’d enjoy it anymore.
TMD: But what about rock star?
R: Rock star has its perks. But I don’t think it’s something you can major in. You can’t learn that stuff.
TMD: If I made a shirt that was totally plain except it had “Two girls short of a m