Welcome to the random student interview where we accost and humiliate a poor student. This week’s victim: Jim. What are you studying?
Environment and political science.
Meaning you want to be a …
I want to go into a public policy school and eventually run for an elected office in my lifetime.
OK, so you have no interest in making money.
What’s the highest aspiration for you … the oval office?
I’d like to have a seat on the congress; that’s aiming really high. A state senate office would be really nice.
Do you belong to MSA?
No, I do not.
So who do you think you are?
Well I’m going to graduate school for public policy.
Hopefully Indiana, I haven’t gotten my acceptance yet, but I’ve applied.
Is that a good school?
It’s the third best public policy school in the country.
What are the top two?
Shoot, I don’t remember.
Is that because you got rejected and you are rationalizing?
No, Indiana specializes in Environment so that’s why I want to go there.
If you say so. How do you feel about how Obama is doing?
You know, I agree with him on a lot of things, I disagree with him on a lot of things. I’d say overall, I disagree with him.
Did you vote for him?
This is embarrassing, but I didn’t vote.
You didn’t vote? And you’re running for public office?
Isn’t that sad?
What is your experience with GSIs here at this prestigious University?
Depends on the GSI you get.
Have you ever had one who doesn’t speak English?
Does that frustrate you?
Oh my God … my Calc II GSI, (name retracted). Couldn’t stand him. I could not understand a word that guy said.
Have you ever been accused of being racist?
Have I ever been?
Just because he doesn’t speak English, his name has to be foreign?
That was his name!
Sure it was. Have you ever had a really attractive GSI?
Yes, I have one now actually.
What did she teach? Or he?
Or he (laughs), that’s fair. She teaches Environ 201.
Have you ever had something with her?
It’s completely not off the record.
Well, this is just starting, so I’m going to be working on it I guess.
Is that one of your goals?
You’re just trapping me into questions.
Do you think it’s less unethical to sleep with a GSI than it is to sleep with a professor?
Yes, because they are students just like you. I don’t think that’s unethical.
Would you be upset if you didn’t get an A?
A little bit.
Would you see it as a reflection of your prowess?
It would be after the class.
Oh, so after you get your grade you say: would you like to get some dinner, or sleep with me?
What’s your favorite thing that people serve in the front of Angell hall?
I never get any of the stuff here because you have to sign up for the e-mail list which I don’t like doing.
Wow, God forbid you commit to something. Vote for (last name retracted) in 2016. Do you agree with the stereotype that vegetarians are better people?
That’s not necessarily a stereotype.
Do you think it’s the truth?
Well I see the benefit of vegetariansim because I’m an environment major. I’d do it too if I didn’t like meat so much.
You kill things for consumption and they don’t. So they are not better than you?
I think part of the benefits of the food chain is that we’re on top and morality shouldn’t play into that per say.
Are you in a fraternity?
How do you feel about it?
I like it, it’s a good group of guys.
What about the ladies that you guys get to meet?
Um … I’m not going to comment on the quality of ladies.
It can be totally not off the record.
I’m still not going to comment.
Any potential wives?
Yeah, a brother that just graduated is now engaged.
Mazel tov. Are you going to go to the wedding?
We weren’t that good of friends.
Anything to say about Rich Rod?
I just want us to get a coach and be done with it.
Do you think I can be a Michigan man?
You’re a bit small to be a Michigan coach. I like my coaches to be a bit bigger.