The Michigan Daily: Is Nathan there?
Random: You”ve got him.
TMD: Well congratulations, you have been selected for Weekend, etc.”s Random Student Interview. How does that make you feel?
R: Pretty important. I feel like the chosen one.
TMD: Good, so what are you up to right now?
R: Procrastinating homework, watching TV.
TMD: What are you studying?
TMD: How is that class going for you?
R: It”s pretty easy so far.
TMD: Great, well this is pretty boring, so let”s talk about something else. Have you ever choked on a pretzel before?
TMD: Have you ever choked on anything before?
R: Yeah, I choked on a cherry once.
TMD: On that little thing in the middle?
R: Yeah the pit.
TMD: That is the pits. So what was the last movie you saw?
R: “Lord of the Rings.”
TMD: What did you think of that?
R: It was pretty cool.
TMD: Have you ever seen the movie “Commando?”
TMD: No? No! What do you mean no?
R: Who”s in it?
TMD: It”s with Arnold Schwarzenegger and Vernon Wells.
R: Oh, so it”s one of those Schwarzenegger movies?
TMD: Exactly. So what are your favorite lunch time meal?
R: Pizza, soup
TMD: Do you like sandwiches?
R: Uh, yeah
TMD: Do you like your sandwiches with butter or mayonaise?
R: Butter, I don”t like mayonaise.
TMD: What are your plans for the weekend?
R: Two hockey games, do homework, watch T.V. pretty boring stuff.
TMD: You are going to the Michigan games I assume.
R: Of course.
TMD: What do you think of Bill Martin”s letter to the fans asking them to tone down the behavior.
R: Well it depends on what he means. I don”t think the chants should stop, but I can see the problem with offending fans from the opposing teams.
TMD: I guess. So have you ever known anyone with scurvy?
R: I think that disease died out in the 18th Century.
TMD: That”s too bad, I thought my third grade teacher had scurvy. So do you like Taco Bell?
TMD: That”s horrible.
R: Well I like to think of it as Toxic Hell.
TMD: Well that”s about it. Is there anyone you would like to make a shout out to.
R: I would shout out to my girlfriend but she is right here.
TMD: OK, anyone else?
R: Uh, the First Little Crew.
TMD: Great, be sure to read Weekend, Etc. Take it easy.
Rookie interviewer realizes he can”t fill the page. Decides to call back.
TMD: Hey it”s Matt from The Michigan Daily again?
R: Time for another interview again?
TMD: Yeah I need to fill space. So have you heard of that new pirate movie?
TMD: Yeah, the new movie about the pirates?
TMD: Well I heard it”s rated “Arrr!”
R: Ha. My girlfriend had told me that before.
TMD: Good, well be sure to read Weekend and have a good weekend.