TMD: Hello, you have been chosen for Weekend”s Random Student Interview. Do you know what that is?

R: I”ve been chosen for what?

TMD: The Michigan Daily”s Random Student Interview. You”re the Random Student.

R: O.K. What do I have to do?

TMD: I”m going to ask you a bunch of questions, and you answer them randomly, if you”d like.

R: O.K.

TMD: O.K. Cool. So first question. Do you live in a mansion, apartment, shack or house?

R: I live in West Quad.

TMD: So which would that be?

R: I guess it”s sort of like an apartment. But it”s really a dorm.

TMD: Did you play M.A.S.H. when you were younger?

R: No.

TMD: It”s a game where you and your friends predict your future based on when you say “stop!” as your friend is drawing a spiral.

R: What?

TMD: Never mind. My next question was, “How closely does your current life match up with what M.A.S.H. may have predicted for you?” But I don”t think I should ask that.

R: No.

TMD: Did you vote for George Bush?

R: I didn”t vote.

TMD: Why?

R: Because I wasn”t old enough.

TMD: Are you old enough now?

R: To vote? Yeah. My 18th birthday was actually a week after Election Day in 2000.

TMD: That”s not very interesting. I may cut it. Do you care?

R: No.

TMD: Did you play Nintendo growing up?

R: Of course.

TMD: Excellent. Then I can ask the next question I have prepared. Which was a superior game: Zelda or Contra?

R: Contra. I”ve always preferred action games. Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A, select, start.

TMD: Touch. I noticed you said “select” before start. That means you were playing with a friend.

R: Or I just played both players.

TMD: Were you that kid?

R: Sometimes, yeah.

TMD: If you don”t mind me saying, that”s a bit dorky. Do you have friends to play video games with now?

R: I don”t really play as much anymore. And no, I don”t mind. I was a dork.

TMD: Are you enjoying this interview?

R: I have to shower. I have class.

TMD: Do you use a loofa?

R: A loofa?

TMD: A bath sponge? In the shower.

R: Oh. Yeah.

TMD: What class do you have?

R: Econ.

TMD: Can you explain the Nash Equilibrium to me?

R: We haven”t gotten to that yet.

TMD: Can you explain supply and demand?

R: Sort of.

TMD: Explain it. In 10 words.

R: As demand increases, supply decreases. Vice versa.

TMD: That was only Seven words.

R: I”m doing really well so far.

TMD: In econ or in this interview?

R: In econ.

TMD: I”d say neither. You couldn”t explain the Nash Equilibrium to me, which means you couldn”t answer a question that was an econ question and an interview question.

R: Yeah I guess.

TMD: What”s your G.P.A?

R: 4.0.

TMD: You”re a freshman?

R: Yeah. What year are you?

TMD: I”m a You”re being interviewed. I ask the questions. But anyway, I think this is enough, so I”ll let you go. Thanks for indulging me. Good luck with econ.

R: Thanks. Bye.

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