TMD: Hello, you have been chosen for Weekend”s Random Student Interview. Do you know what that is?
R: I”ve been chosen for what?
TMD: The Michigan Daily”s Random Student Interview. You”re the Random Student.
R: O.K. What do I have to do?
TMD: I”m going to ask you a bunch of questions, and you answer them randomly, if you”d like.
R: O.K.
TMD: O.K. Cool. So first question. Do you live in a mansion, apartment, shack or house?
R: I live in West Quad.
TMD: So which would that be?
R: I guess it”s sort of like an apartment. But it”s really a dorm.
TMD: Did you play M.A.S.H. when you were younger?
R: No.
TMD: It”s a game where you and your friends predict your future based on when you say “stop!” as your friend is drawing a spiral.
R: What?
TMD: Never mind. My next question was, “How closely does your current life match up with what M.A.S.H. may have predicted for you?” But I don”t think I should ask that.
R: No.
TMD: Did you vote for George Bush?
R: I didn”t vote.
TMD: Why?
R: Because I wasn”t old enough.
TMD: Are you old enough now?
R: To vote? Yeah. My 18th birthday was actually a week after Election Day in 2000.
TMD: That”s not very interesting. I may cut it. Do you care?
R: No.
TMD: Did you play Nintendo growing up?
R: Of course.
TMD: Excellent. Then I can ask the next question I have prepared. Which was a superior game: Zelda or Contra?
R: Contra. I”ve always preferred action games. Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A, select, start.
TMD: Touch. I noticed you said “select” before start. That means you were playing with a friend.
R: Or I just played both players.
TMD: Were you that kid?
R: Sometimes, yeah.
TMD: If you don”t mind me saying, that”s a bit dorky. Do you have friends to play video games with now?
R: I don”t really play as much anymore. And no, I don”t mind. I was a dork.
TMD: Are you enjoying this interview?
R: I have to shower. I have class.
TMD: Do you use a loofa?
R: A loofa?
TMD: A bath sponge? In the shower.
R: Oh. Yeah.
TMD: What class do you have?
R: Econ.
TMD: Can you explain the Nash Equilibrium to me?
R: We haven”t gotten to that yet.
TMD: Can you explain supply and demand?
R: Sort of.
TMD: Explain it. In 10 words.
R: As demand increases, supply decreases. Vice versa.
TMD: That was only Seven words.
R: I”m doing really well so far.
TMD: In econ or in this interview?
R: In econ.
TMD: I”d say neither. You couldn”t explain the Nash Equilibrium to me, which means you couldn”t answer a question that was an econ question and an interview question.
R: Yeah I guess.
TMD: What”s your G.P.A?
R: 4.0.
TMD: You”re a freshman?
R: Yeah. What year are you?
TMD: I”m a You”re being interviewed. I ask the questions. But anyway, I think this is enough, so I”ll let you go. Thanks for indulging me. Good luck with econ.
R: Thanks. Bye.