The Michigan Daily: Hi, is Hillary there?
Random: This is she.
TMD: You have been selected for the Random Student
Interview.
R: No kidding!
TMD: Seriously. Are you down for it?
R: Absolutely. I’m game.
TMD: If I wore a shirt that said “Kiss Me,
I’m Irish,” would you do it?
R: Absolutely, why not?
TMD: That’s great. Because I’m wearing one
right now.
R: Well, come on over.
TMD: I’ll be right there, but I have to finish this
interview first. Do you like bangers and mash?
R: What’s that?
TMD: I’m asking the question here. Yes or no?
R: Ok, I’ll have to say … possibly.
TMD: Which dance instructor is cooler, Wade Robson or
Darren from “Darren’s Dance Grooves?”
R: I’ll have to go with Darren because he has a
cooler name.
TMD: Do you know how to do the pop-and-lock?
R: The pop-and-lock?
TMD: It was on Darren’s Dance Grooves!
R: No, how do you do it?
TMD: It’s a very complicated move involving moving
around and popping your shoulders and locking.
R: But you have to be double jointed or something for
that, don’t you?
TMD: Not how Darren does it.
R: Darren’s the man, though. How do you know about
this?
TMD: I work for Daily Arts. We know a lot of things. Did
you see that clip on CNN a while ago where some breakdancers
performed for the Pope?
R: No, is that a true story?
TMD: Yes, that is a true story. What do you think the
Pope thought about it?
R: I bet inside it was tearing him apart.
TMD: Breakdancing was tearing the Pope apart?
R: Yeah, why not?
TMD: If someone used a pickup line on you, would you go
out with them?
R: If it was a creative one. If it wasn’t like
“I’ll be your daddy mac,” I think I’d go
with it.
TMD: Let me tell you that I can dance really well.
R: What can you do that could impress me?
TMD: I can do the pop-and-lock.
R: No, you can’t.
TMD: Yes, I can.
R: Where does this go? Is this some little thing or in a
newspaper or what?
TMD: Yes, this is the Daily. We’re a newspaper.
R: How do you pick people to do it?
TMD: Just randomly. That’s why it’s the
Random Student Interview. Let’s talk politics … do you
think George Washington had a nice smile?
R: I mean, he’s on the dollar bill. That’s
not bad. He should show his pearly whites more often.
TMD: You are aware he had wooden teeth, aren’t
you?
R: Haha, no. Can you like use a different name, like a
pseudo-name? I wouldn’t want to disgrace my name.
TMD: What name would you like us to use?
R: What’s a hot name? What name should I use?
TMD: Like Alexis?
R: Sure, Alexis sounds hot.
TMD: Let’s go with that. Who was your favorite
father figure on “Full House:” Danny, Jesse or Uncle
Joey?
R: Uncle Jesse. He was sexy.
TMD: You thought Uncle Jesse was sexy?
R: Oh yeah … oh man … are you kidding? He
has sideburns going for him.
TMD: What job do you think is the worst possible job you
could ever have?
R: Hmmmm … worst job … Port-a-Potty
cleaner-outer … that’s what my roommate said.
TMD: So you’re going to go with Port-a-Potty
cleaner-outer?
R: No, let me get back to you. Next question.
TMD: What song is more annoying: “Who Let the Dogs
Out” or “The Macarena?”
R: I think “Toxic.”
TMD: Why don’t you like “Toxic”?
R: The words just kind of get annoying. And that
“Milkshake” song, but I think they retired it on
“TRL.”
TMD: You know about P. Diddy’s group, right?
R: What group?
TMD: It’s called Da Band. It’s a rap group.
Do you think Da Band is the worst name for a group ever?
R: Yeah, that is pretty lame … kind of vague,
don’t you think?
TMD: Yeah, I mean … they’re not even a band!
If something was cool, would you say it was “sexy” or
would you say it was “all that and a bag of potato
chips?”
R: Oh, sexy, for sure.
TMD: So is “sexy” the new cool word to
use?
R: It’s not the cool word to use. You say what you
want. You say what you feel. You say what’s in the
moment.
TMD: You sound like a Hallmark card. Well, thanks for
doing this. Look for it in Weekend.