5 – Scotty Ngyuen Bobble-Head Dolls — 1998 World Series of Poker champion Scotty Nguyen finally joins the ranks of Detroit Piston Ben Wallace and Detroit Red Wing Steve Yzerman, modeling for a bobble-head likeness of himself at a card table dressed in characteristic ’80s garb. He’s holding pocket snowmen, a pair of eights — be scared, baby.
4 – Zach Braff — The young “Scrubs” golden boy has “Oscar” written all over him after writing, directing and starring in “Garden State.” In between “Scrubs” shootings, he also managed to direct the music video of the Gavin DeGraw single “Chariot” and squeeze in a hilarious guest spot on “Arrested Development.” Has the Academy lowered the age limit for Lifetime Achievement Award yet?
3 – “We Be Burnin’ ” — Sean Paul’s newest Jamaican-inspired jam — a reggae salute to all those who make money, help the economy and smoke “Mary J.” everyday — hits the airwaves this week. Betcha can’t wait to see Dubya halt the war on drugs after hearing this testimony to good citizenship.
2 – Ken Jennings — As if his “Jeopardy!” millions weren’t enough, Jennings monopolizes the television for a second time in a string of commercials for Allstate and Cingular, both of which include gentle jabs at his monstrous success. Oh, and for all those who quit on Trebek after Jennings exited, put your thumbs back on the buzzer: word is he’ll return for an “Ultimate Tournament of Champions” episode at the end of the month.
1 – Fox T.V. — Football hasn’t been this exciting since the Super Bowl, “24” is hot and getting hotter, Jeffrey Tambor and his “Arrested Development” co-stars keep everyone in stitches, the 16th season of “The Simpsons” reigns supreme in the animated genre and Fox clearly has a lock on the Sunday-Monday schedule. It may not have Jack Bauer, but “American Idol” pulls in more votes than the last presidential election.