Three things you can talk about this week:

Talking Points

1. Musharraf giving up his uniform

2. Skin cells

3. MSA scandals

And three things you can’t:

1. Christmas

2. New episodes of “Last Call with Carson Daly”

3. Les Miles

Quotes of the week

“I turned into the artist.”

Lois Gibson, the forensic artist on the “Baby Grace” case, on how she created a nearly identical rendering of the toddler’s appearance from her remains

“I spend not a nanosecond listening to what each of them are sniping toward each other, so I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

John Edwards, answering a question about Hillary Clinton’s criticism of Barack Obama’s foreign relations experience

“We don’t know if it’s due to the glacial weather this morning or to unbridled passion, but a couple did not hesitate in having sexual relations in a waiting room at the Koge train station.”

Carsten Anderson, police spokesman, on the possible reasons a couple decided to have sex in a Danish station

YouTube video of the week

Not The Daily Show

In a parody of “The Daily Show with Jon Stewart,” Jason Ross, one of the show’s writers, gives a news broadcast on the Writers Guild of America strike in New York City.

Ross compares the writer’s plight to Viacom’s lawsuit against YouTube in which a Viacom executive harangues that media material shouldn’t be used without the creators getting their fair dues – an argument all too familiar to striking film and TV writers.

Viacom is suing YouTube for $1 billion for copyright infringement.

In the back left corner, a fellow writer holds signs simulating the Daily Show graphics behind Jon Stewart.

With sarcastic comments on Viacom and the writers’ claims, Ross mimics Jon Stewart, or at least his jokes, until “John J. Viacom, Jr. III” comes and demands the show “cease and desist.” He is only successful in turning over Ross’s table.

And now, here it is, your moment of Zen: “Getting paid is the name of the game,” said Sumner Redstone, the chair of Viacom.

– Emily Barton

See this and other YouTube videos of the week at youtube.com/user/michigandaily

Theme Party Suggestion

‘Save Capitalism’ benefit – As any news media consumer knows, low spending during Black Friday this year has posed an immediate threat to the nation’s economy. Help restore capitalism with one of those product peddling parties where every guest feels obliged to buy a piece of jewelry or sports memorabilia. Beer might be free at campus parties, but that doesn’t mean your friends should leave with their wallets intact.

Throwing this party? Let us know. TheStatement@umich.edu

Study of the week

The Americas were populated in one migration

University researchers have found genetic evidence that supports the theory that the native peoples of North America came to the continent from Siberia by way of a land bridge in one movement, a University release said Tuesday.

The land bridge theory is opposed by experts who believe the continent’s populations arrived in separate migrations from different places.

The study’s researchers examined genetic variation at 678 locations in the DNA of living members of 29 Native American populations across North, Central and South America, as well as two Siberian groups.

The study suports the land bridge theory with findings that genetic similarity to Siberian populations decreased the farther a native people is from the Bering Strait and that a genetic variation is present in native populations across the American continents.

— Jessica Vosgerchian

By the numbers

19,000,000 – Number of new STD infections diagnosed each year

13.8 – Percentage increase of the number of diagnosed syphilis cases in 2006 from 2005

40 – Estimated percentage of undiagnosed chlamydia cases

Source: Centers for Disease Control and Prevention

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