Although the Decider can’t solve a conflict that his administration created four years ago, Bush met with Palestinian leader Mahmoud Abbas, Israeli Prime Minister Ehud Olmert and leaders of 42 other nations in Annapolis, Md. last week, announcing that a peace agreement to the 60-year-old conflict with roots that go back 4,000 years is expected to be completed by the end of next year.

Peace at last?

Rating: 8

David’s books barons

Seizing between 800 and 1,000 books that were allegedly stolen from Ulrich’s and possibly other campus bookstores, the Ann Arbor Police raided David’s Books on East William Street. Stumped as to how so many books, including rare and expensive medical books, were stolen from Ulrich’s, the police hypothesized that the book barons “must not have left their backpacks on the rack.”

Rating: 4

Taking a campaign hostage

With road flares strapped to his chest, Leeland Eisenberg took a Hillary Clinton campaign office in New Hampshire hostage Friday. Eisenberg demanded to speak with Clinton about receiving mental health services, and she reportedly agreed to talk, but law enforcement officials stopped her. In response, the Rudy Giuliani campaign pointed out that Clinton negotiates with terrorists; his staffers have guns and would have shot the man.

Rating: 3

Getting out of gitmo

Today, the U.S. Supreme Court begins oral arguments for the first case in which it will specifically address whether or not Guantanamo Bay detainees have habeas corpus rights. According to the Bush administration, the case is vitally important, because even if they weren’t terrorists when they arrived, after years of indefinite detention and torture, they’re bound to be terrorists by now.

Rating: 7

An Egg-headed proposal

In a move to accommodate Ann Arborites who want fresh eggs, at a weekend council retreat, Ann Arbor City Councilman Stephen Kunselman proposed allowing city residents to keep hens in their yards or houses. Ann Arbor hippies are uncertain how the city will make sure that the hens are free range and instead proposed that the city allow chickens to buy houses.

Rating: 1

A lot of pot

After pulling over a white Chevrolet Uplander last week, Michigan State Police troopers found nearly 500 pounds of marijuana wrapped in cellophane and covered with blankets in the minivan, valued at more than $600,000. In related news, several witnesses reported hearing Bob Marley at the Ypsilanti State Police post and Pink Floyd at the Jackson post.

Rating: 2

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