The hardest part of studying abroad is coming back home. Yes, you read that right. It’s not the culture shock of entering a new territory, the time adjustment or the food. It’s not even the mysterious eight-week illness that continues to wreak havoc on my immune system. Out of all the adventures and mishaps I’ve faced during my time abroad, the biggest challenge has been returning home.
For starters, let’s focus on the simple things. Jet lag is much easier to overcome heading to a foreign land with endless treasures to seek out. While my first day in Rome involved a castle, the Vatican, an authentic Italian meal with 25 strangers and a moonlit trip to the Trevi Fountain, my first day back in Michigan started with a trip to the doctor, followed by some quality time with my couch, my dog and my DVR. Needless to say, getting my sleep schedule back on track was a bit more difficult.
And then there’s the food. I’ll admit it, even as the major foodie I claim to be, after six weeks I was ready for some good ol’ American cooking. Chicken tenders, pancakes, French fries, ranch dressing, milk shakes, hotdogs; I spent my first few days back loading up on the classics. And then it hit me — “it” being a tremendous belly ache — and I remembered that this isn’t the food I normally eat. The string of food seen in every McDonalds commercial had somehow replaced my usual fruits and veggies. Out of all the changes I expected from studying abroad, I never anticipated having to retrain myself how to eat normally at home.
Despite hours of meetings, orientation, prep work and endless advice, the heads-up that coming home can be difficult was never brought up. And the immediate symptoms that shock your system upon re-entry aren’t the only adjustments that were never mentioned.
Being gone for as little as two months made me realize just how fast things can change. I expected to have an earth-shattering experience in Italy, chock-full of enough stories and memorable moments to last a lifetime. What I didn’t anticipate was just how much would change back at home while I was away.
I expected to come back home and fall into the same routine, but I took for granted the fact that all the people I interact with have lives too. I had fallen far behind on the news and gossip concerning my loved ones. Moreover, I found myself in the odd position of having to schedule appointments with my friends and family in order to catch up because their routine had readjusted in the time I was away. The problem is, while they had all found new and productive ways to fill their time, I was dramatically separated from the people who I shared everything with for the past two months.
That’s another thing they don’t tell you in the brochure: form deep bonds and come away with new friends (who you will miss like hell from the moment you step back onto American soil). No one mentions how lonely it can be to separate yourself from the people that you’ve spent every minute of every day with for weeks on end. I expected to love returning to the privacy and serenity of my own home, but that feeling was overwhelmed by how much I missed being able to walk down the hall and find someone to hang out with at any time of day, or the security of always having someone ready to grab dinner or go shopping.
I now realize just how fast things can change, and I also know that in just a few weeks my reality will shift once again. Back to campus. Back to football. Back to homework and late-night delivery from Pizza House. I’ll soon return to all these things I find so familiar, but with a newfound appreciation for the nuanced challenges of coming home.
Caitlin Morath can be reached at cmorath@umich.edu.