1. The Great Depression, DMX Yeah, DMX and every music critic (and everyone with at least one ear) is depressed because this CD beat Enya.

2. Morning View, Incubus This is kind of like that feeling guys get in the morning, that prevents them from peeing.

3. A Day Without Rain, Enya If the damn dirty apes ever really take over the world, we may just see this little beauty popping up in film.

4. God Bless America, Various Artists Hey, if God is really on our side, how come this album fell three spots?

5. Pain is Love, Ja Rule Alright, point taken, Ja really, really loves his fans.

6. Live in Chicago, Dave Matthews Band If you like this ass-sucking crap, consider yourself off my Christmas list

7. Silver Side Up, Nickelback Do you think these guys got together and decided to be this bad? Do they practice not getting too good?

8. Hybrid Theory, Linkin Park In the end, after all the fan-fare and critical acclaim, this album is still sub-par to my own feces. Get it?

9. 8701, Usher Have you played Grand Theft Auto 3 for PS2? God, does that game rock. Seriously, when you use the rocket launcher on a helicopter? It”s the bomb-diggity.

10. Totally Hits 2001, Various Artists You know who I”d like to, like, totally hit? Everyone that had anything to do with this CD, especially the parents of the bands.

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