1. 8 Mile, Soundtrack – You’d better never let this play on your CD player.

2. Justified, Justin Timberlake – The pop singer has no appreciation for wordplay; Justinfied would have been awesome.

3. The Best of 1990-2000 & B-Sides, U2 – We would think of something clever for this, but Zooropa and Pop sucked so bad that we’re still speechless.

4. Stripped, Christina Aguilera – You are not talented or hot.

5. Shaman, Santana – Hear his credibility disappearing with every ripping guitar solo.

6. Cry, Faith Hill – We’re crying ourselves to sleep because of this list.

7. The Eminem Show, Eminem – Watch. This will be on VH1’s so-called “Ultimate Album” show in like a month.

8. Still Ghetto, Jaheim – Still crying.

9. Live at Folsom Field Boulder, Colorado, Dave Matthews Band – Well, your last few albums were sub-par, so why not do a live album? Hey, why not take a cue from Pearl Jam and do 200 of them. We’re kidding, Dave. Seriously. Don’t.

10. Nirvana, Nirvana – I’ve got a new complaint. This sucks.

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