It’s a Wednesday afternoon and your last class of the day was cancelled. The unseasonably warm weather, sitting at about at 54 degrees Fahrenheit, and clear-skies sunlight has you rejecting all academia. “I am young – I have nothing due tomorrow,” you rationalize. And you’re not alone. You head over to the friend with the awesome porch couch to hang with those who likewise refuse to deny these conditions. By 4:30 you’re on your second beer, and by 6:00 you’ve had four. You’re pretty drunk, and the self-loathing starts to set in. The sober, more dedicated students cross the street, probably off to do something much more productive than anything your inebriated ass could perform in that moment. But why compare yourself to the honest, hardworking individuals walking by? This campus is massive, and so there must be some people slacking off less awesomely than you are right now. Ignore the nagging voice in your head, beckoning you to please go spend your Wednesday less selfishly. Pop some tunes in, enjoy your life and let the good vibes flow.
“Cold Cold Man” – Saint Motel
Slightly ironic since it’s now finally above freezing, this jazzy piano summer song is just begging to be blasted through speakers and dispense good vibes to all involved. (Also great for dramatic group serenades/lip-synching.)
“Goldtone” – Kurt Vile
Kurt Vile wrote the book on good vibes. Here’s 10 minutes of sunny afternoon bliss and fast-approaching summer gold tones, literally.
“Old Thing Back (Remix)” – Matoma & The Notorious B.I.G.
We’re not sure what it is about this hit that puts a bounce in our stride — the casual snapping, the legendary saxophone, the smooth vocals of Ralph Tresvant or a grooved-out combination of all three. Whatever it may be, “Old Thing Back” fosters undeniable enthusiasm and offers a hip, tangy sidekick to our fifth beer.
“Freak Like Me” – Adina Howard
This song is dripping with G-funk, sexual innuendo and some other liquids I don’t care to mention. I’ve also never thrown this song on and not seen people singing/grooving along with a mix of radiant lust, joy and malevolence (usually after a few Long Island iced teas, though).
“Only Wanna Be With You” – Hootie and the Blowfish
It is exactly stupid enough for me to enjoy it drunk and also has the added bonus of me thinking I know all the words but really only knowing the title phrase. Plus, my serenade would obviously lure any passerby onto the porch.
“Stacy’s Mom” – Fountains of Wayne
The oddly warm day is reminiscent of the music video I used to jam to on “VH1 Top Twenty Countdown” before YouTube became a real thing. And nothing completes a good darty (even if it’s two people) than a solid throwback.
“Africa” – Toto
Nothing says “darty” quite like dancing foolishly and singing loudly for everyone to see, beer in hand. And what better way to embarrass yourself than to aggressively air drum along to Toto’s ballad of the Serengeti?
“Doo Wop (That Thing)” – Lauryn Hill
Hit play and let the groove of the imponderably funky Lauryn Hill take you from day to night. This one’s chill, happy and perfect for drunken porch booty-shaking. Do your thing, you dartying fool.
“Tumbling Dice” – The Rolling Stones
A classic that’s guaranteed to get the good vibes rolling (tumbling?). And hey, at least you know you’re probably in better shape than the band was when they wrote it.
“Violet” – Daniel Caesar
You might as well be touching yourself before you hit play because Daniel Caesar is the angel you’ve been dreaming of, whispering honey-drizzle as he drops juicy grapes into your drunk-ass mouth. Lose the world for a moment.
“Wipe Me Down” – Lil’ Boosie
This is just the song to bring excitement to a casual Wednesday afternoon. When you’re trying to transition a chill out into turn up, upon hearing the catchy “shoulders, chest, pants, shoes” hook come on you’re bound to get off of your porch couch and dance.
–Ken “Bagel Mane” Selander
“Feel That” – Vic Mensa
You’re feelin’ it after some hours of drinking but somehow still think you’re okay (“I’m not that drunk, I swear!”). Despite no longer having full motor skills, you nod your head along with the bumping track while remaining stationary, so as not to embarrass yourself further.
“Lonesome” – Dr. Dog
What does it take to be lonesome – nothing at all! You’re not sure what the boys of Dr. Dog understand, or what they are saying that is magnetizing you this porch. But here’s a band that, if they were to be a beer, indubitably match the North Peak Diabolical IPA you continue to wield.
“Electric Relaxation” by A Tribe Called Quest
Relax yourself, and don’t try to understand the hook. Kick up your feet and groove to that funky rhythm section.
“My Cherie Amour” by Stevie Wonder
One of the greatest vocal performance of all time, this is the song that plays when the sun first comes out for Spring.
“Adorn” by Miguel
For when you want something just one notch more subtle than “Sexual Healing,” this’ll make all the passersby turn their heads (even if they’re bumping Kendrick on their headphones).
– Adam Theisen
“Cocoa Butter Kisses” – Chance the Rapper feat. Vic Mensa & Twista
Daily Savings has given you an extra hour to let the sun shine down on your drunken tomfoolery, but it’s now reaching 7:45 p.m. and it’s come time to return to your spinning (literally) reality. Chance, however, along with Vic and Twista, is here to talk you through and mellow out your return to reality. There’s always homework to complete and stress is endless, but “okie dokie, alky, keep it lowkey like Thor lil bro.” Ahhh Chance’s rap, and the song’s concurrent smoothness and effectiveness, makes “Cocoa Butter Kisses” is a great transition song. It holds social commentary with an inexplicably carmel feel. Look at you, your being analytical again! Now, go move that thinking into your essay that’s due Friday. Let’s reenter the world to this one.