Sh*t You Should Know About: I’m Abroad and I Don’t Know What’s Going On
Hola from Barcelona! Apologies for my absence — I’ve been without a phone or skim milk for 3 weeks and that’s kept me pretty preoccupied. I’m also rapidly realizing that following American culture while an ocean away on spotty Spanish wifi proves muy dificil. So I’m doing the best I can, despite the fact that my roommates almost exclusively listen the Chainsmokers. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll drunk dance to “Roses” as much as the next gal, but I’m only so strong.
On Saturday night, I had to listen to Drake’s new song by myself, with headphones in, while lying in bed. Not the ideal setup. And, tonight, all I want to do is listen to it while taking shots of tequila before going to some sketchy Spanish club. But no, I can’t because I’m sure we’ll be playing “Hide Away” on loop. That’s beside the point, though, because WE HAVE NEW FUCKING DRAKE. It feels like years since What A Time To Be Alive dropped in September, and it feels like ages since he announced Views From The 6 a little over a year ago. We’ve since been waiting (im)patiently for this ambiguous release date to come, and finally, yesterday the rapper teased on his Instagram that new music off of Views would premier on OVO Sound Radio later that day.
And that it did. Six times, back to back to back to back to back to back, he played new song “Summer Sixteen.” Again, picture me alone in my bed, listening to this song, six times in a row. Like, how am I supposed to go to sleep now? After the theatrical debut, Drake confirmed Views would (finally!!!) be out in April. The OVO Sound set also included new 2 Chainz (“MFN Right”) and Roy Woods (“SKRT” remix), which are both worth a couple listens. Rihanna’s new album, ANTI, was on there, too; I haven’t heard the whole thing, apparently it’s great, despite its terrible rollout and the supposed “technical glitch” that caused it’s early release on Tidal. And, of course, Meek Mill made some comments about Drake’s new track on Twitter, but I didn’t even care to read about it.
Kanye’s been pretty active on Twitter, beginning with the botched release of single “Real Friends” — he uploaded and then deleted and then uploaded and then deleted and then uploaded the track to Soundcloud and live tweeted the whole thing. Hey, even Yeezus makes mistakes. But since then, he’s relied heavily on the outlet to communicate to fans details about his new project, including the release of its second single, “No More Parties In LA” and the announcement of its name change, from Swish to Waves (now TBA).
The latter ended up being quite controversial; Wiz Khalifa took to Twitter to make clear that he was not cool with #Waves, accusing Kanye of stealing “waves” from rapper Max B, who pioneered the smoother, “wavy” hip hop movement. (Completely un-coincidentally, Drake started off the OVO Sound set I mentioned earlier with a Max B track.) Wiz’s comments sparked some rapid-fire responses from Kanye, all of which have since been deleted. But here are some of my favorites:
Kanye even brought his ex and Wiz’s current girlfriend, Amber Rose, into the mix
Damn, Ye – you nasty. Realizing his error, Kanye tried to do some damage control, which was honestly more funny as fuck than effective.
Look at that emoji usage!!!
And it just keeps getting funnier, because Amber Rose then jumps in and accuses Kanye of liking butt stuff. “#FingersInTheBootyAssBitch” is easily the best hashtag of 2016, though “#Wixwearscoolpants” is a close second. Kanye addressed the accusation by claiming he “stays away from that area all together.” Good to know. And with that, the feud concluded.
Just on sheer principal I’ve gotta side with Kanye on this one. And because I harbor a deep seeded resentment for I’m Schmacked’s use of “Work Hard, Play Hard” and all the fucking terrible posts it prompted in the class of 2017 admitted students Facebook page. Guess how many students searching for roommates had “that work hard, play hard mentality” ??? You know what I’m talking about, class of 2017.
I also just read somewhere that Kanye and Young Thug have reportedly made over 40 songs together. I don’t even know what to do with that info but I just thought I’d throw it out there.
And that’s really all I know about America right now. Is California out of water yet? What’s Sarah Palin doing right now?
Also, does anyone know where I can buy Triscuits in Spain?