March 22, 2023
by Josh Taubman and Spencer Raines

Good morning,

Well guys, winter is officially over. And you know what that means:

Our long hibernation period has ended and it’s time to emerge from our caves (dirty college houses) to bask in the sun’s majestic rays (maybe go outside for a few minutes until we decide it’s still too cold).

However you do it, it’s time to make the most of this spring. For us here at the Maynard Street Blitz that means — predictably — watching a ridiculous amount of college basketball games and betting on all of them. 

Maybe your bracket is still intact. Maybe your interests have shifted to picking your classes or figuring out your summer plans. Maybe you just want to set up a hammock and open a good book. 

Whatever the case, the sun is out. Spring is springing. Sports are sporting. So take advantage.

Anna Fuder/Daily. Buy this photo.

Angel Reese overwhelms Michigan in season-ending blowout

The Michigan women’s basketball team entered its matchup with LSU Sunday night with hopes of making a 3rd straight Sweet Sixteen. Fresh off a resounding win over No. 11 seed UNLV, the Wolverines felt confident about their upset chances against the third-seeded Tigers. 

But LSU forward Angel Reese had other plans. 

Reese dominated Michigan all night long, proving to be an unstoppable force. Daily Sports Writer Lys Goldman captured her dominating performance.

“Putting up 25 points, 24 total rebounds, six blocks and four assists — all team-highs — in addition to firing up the crowd during key moments, Reese showed exactly what makes her so special.”

Reese racked up offensive rebounds, 14 in total, to stymie any hopes for a Michigan victory. As the boards piled up, so did the celebrations. She griddied down the court and made “too little” signals toward the Wolverines’ bench. She was a star holding the crowd in the palm of her hand, with Michigan forced to sit front row. 

Angel Reese was clearly the best player on the floor on Sunday — and her performance had the Wolverines begging for mercy all evening. 

A Michigan wrestler excitedly yells while holding his headgear in one hand and the ref holds up his other hand to signal a victory. The wrestler holds up one finger with his hand and behind him the crowd cheers.

Riley Nieboer/Daily. Buy this photo.

Mason Parris clinches heavyweight title, three Michigan wrestlers earn All-American honors at NCAA tournament

Michigan wrestling has itself a national champion.

While it fell short of the team title this past weekend at the NCAA wrestling championship, fifth-year senior heavyweight Mason Parris found his way to the mountaintop after dominating Penn State’s Greg Kerkvliet in the final.

For Parris, the final match was more of a coronation than a true battle. The entire tournament, a culmination of Parris’ years of hard work and coming up just short, was the same way.

“Following a perfect 33-0 regular season,” Daily sports writer Megan Smith writes, “Parris didn’t slow down and dominated his opponents at every stage of the tournament. In the first four rounds of the tournament, he won two bouts via major decision and beat Iowa’s No. 4 Tony Cassiopi with a 16-1 technical fall in the semifinal. Preparing for the second national championship bout of his career, Parris rode the momentum he had built up in the previous rounds and remained poised.”

Read more of this story if you desperately need a win in your life, because you, much like Parris, deserve it.

Julianne Yoon/Daily.  Buy this photo.

Built off an entire season at the net, Dylan Duke scores Big Ten Championship-winning goal

This weekend’s Big Ten Hockey Championship between Michigan and Minnesota had everything: two top-ranked teams, NHL prospects all over the ice, a dazzling ankle breaker goal, and a back and forth affair with neither squad leading by more than one. 

Midway through the third period, with the game tied at three, a championship trophy still hung in the balance. 

That’s when sophomore forward Dylan Duke etched his name into the history books. 

Duke corralled a puck in front of the net before getting knocked down by a Golden Gopher defender. Despite this, Duke remained in control, working the puck around the goalie and scoring from his knees.

The goal wasn’t pretty but that was no issue for Duke. As Daily Sports Editor Noah Kingsley explains, that’s how he’s been getting it done all year.

“After a full season of taking pucks off skates, sticks and limbs to put them in the back of the net, Duke constantly took ownership of the most important area of the rink. 

“And after spending the entire night in the slot once again, taking ownership of that area in the third period on Saturday just so happened to produce his big moment, to produce the Big Ten Championship-winning goal.”

Michigan secures eighth Big Ten Championship in 10 years 

Michigan falls to Ohio State in Columbus for third straight year

Comeback win sparks Michigan Big Ten regular season title  

Letitia Sim shines as Michigan’s only individual finalist in NCAA Championship 

Michigan overwhelmed by Notre Dame’s offense, loses 18-8  

Terrence Williams looks up as he walks off the court. Around him Vanderbilt players run to celebrate their win.

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Jack Glanville: Stop personally attacking student athletes

We don’t know about you, but we here at the Maynard Street Blitz don’t take criticism very well. So luckily for us, we’re only internet micro-celebrities and we don’t get subjected to the harsh realities of being a more visible presence in the public eye. We, along with most of you, aren’t scrutinized by people we don’t even know, we don’t get criticized for every mistake, we don’t receive personal attacks on the internet if we mess up.

And as Daily Sports Editor Jack Glanville states in his column, that’s simply a luxury that student athletes don’t have  — and that’s kind of ridiculous, don’t you think?

These are college students, just like us, and yet they face vitriol anytime they make a mistake.

“After the loss on Saturday, the onslaught only got worse,” Glanville writes. “Terrance Williams II took the brunt of the heat. As his performance was ridiculed, calls for Williams to enter the transfer portal echoed, too.

“Think about that. Fans called for a 22-year-old college junior to leave the school he’s called home for the past three years. 

“Because of basketball.”

So next time you’re ready to send hate to an athlete on Twitter, take a moment to think about how it might be received.

Anna Fuder/Daily. Buy this photo.

Chef’s Corner: What bets are Josh and Spencer cooking up?

Current record: 14 wins – 15 losses – 1 outstanding

March giveth, March taketh away. It was an up and down week on the books after the likes of Charleston and Kent State let us down. Shoutout to Furman though. The good news is that, unlike Purdue, our season is not over. We get two more weekends of March Madness and we see plenty of places to profit. 

So, like Tobin Anderson, we’re calling our shot. Eight of them to be exact. Here’s what we cooked up. 

This Week’s Menu

Appetizer (A bite-sized bet to cleanse the pallet of last week’s losses)

Michigan ML vs Colgate (Hockey)

Michigan is humming into the NCAA hockey tournament, fresh off a Big Ten Championship. Do you really think it’s going to lose to a toothpaste company? 

Main Course (Our meatiest — and most confident — bets)

Texas ML vs Xavier -190 (Men’s Basketball)

Horns are up, Horns are waaaaaayyyy up. Take Texas to make it to the Elite Eight, and maybe if you’re feeling dangerous — all the way.

Miami +3.5 vs Villanova  (Women’s Basketball)

Don’t bet against the Cavinder Twins in March. The Canes keep the momentum going against Nova. 

UConn -3.5 vs Arkansas -110 (Men’s Basketball)

Look, we loved seeing Arkansas men’s basketball coach Eric Musselman shirtless as much as the next people, but forgive us if we would rather that be UConn’s Dan Hurley next time instead.

Michigan State -2 vs Kansas State -110 (Men’s Basketball)

Does Kansas State’s men’s basketball coach have a month named after him? Oh, you don’t even know his name? Yeah, we don’t either, take the Spartans.

LSU -5 vs Utah -110 (Women’s Basketball)

As previously stated, Angel Reese is a bucket. Utah is a fraud. We’ll rock with Kim Mulkey and her polka dots

Tennessee -5.5 vs FAU (Men’s Basketball)

Tennessee is going to show everyone why there aren’t more schools named after oceans.

Dessert (Not everyone has room for it, but if you have the appetite the results could be sweet)

UConn to make the Final Four (Women’s Basketball) -140

It’s UConn. Let’s not overthink this. 

The Michigan Daily’s web team is investigating how ChatGPT has changed our campus. We plan to release a data article discussing how students use ChatGPT for essays, coding, club applications, cover letters and beyond. Please fill out this anonymous survey and look for data visualizations in a future edition of The Daily based on the responses.

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