Arbor anecdotes

Published September 10, 2007

It was a sunny day and I was walking through the Diag eating an organic granola bar. I saw a squirrel burrowing a few feet away from me and made some clicking noises at it. I lowered my hand to see if it would acknowledge me.

I broke off a little piece of my granola bar, making sure to avoid the chocolate pieces, because chocolate is toxic to some animals.

I squatted down with the granola bar in my outstretched hand, the nugget of food perched about a centimeter away from the tip of my finger so the squirrel could see what I had to offer.

Surprisingly, it stood upright and took a few steps my way, sniffing for a potential snack.

At this point, I usually get scared and back away - or the squirrel does, but it showed no hesitation. As it neared, I noticed it had kind of a crazed look in its eyes.

I should have just set the food down, but I really wanted to see if it would follow through.

The squirrel walked right up to my hand, but instead of sitting and taking the food off my finger with its paws, as I thought it would do for some reason, it opened its mouth and chomped down on my finger.

And it had really sharp teeth.

I stood up, but the squirrel continued to pursue me. I hurried away from it and examined my finger. It wasn't bleeding, but the skin was broken and had turned purple.
I wondered if I should get a shot, because the crazed little thing probably had rabies, but I wasn't bleeding, so I figured I was OK.

I don't hold it against the squirrel; it wasn't being vicious or anything. But next time I see a hungry squirrel, I'll keep my distance.


Panic in the street

A bit after midnight last Wednesday, the power went out in my house.

As I was about to embark on a hunt through the house to find out which of my housemates had decided to employ one too many hair appliances and blow a fuse, I heard shouts from outside.

We were not suffering alone.

A chorus of infuriated shouts rang out on Church Street. The whole block was out, and the whole block was angry.

About 20 minutes later - during which it seemed like a Michigan State-flavored riot or perhaps the apocalypse might soon be approaching - the omnipotent DTE turned power back on.

I could resume watching Zoolander at last.