You're done voting and there's a lull in classwork - turn on E! and get ready for dirty secrets because Britney Spears and Kevin Federline are breaking up.

TMZ.com obtained the legal documents filed yesterday, in which Spears cited "irreconcilable differences" as the cause for the split. Spears has managed to cement herself as the face of white trash after two failed marriages with only some stretch marks (and kids) to show for it. Meanwhile, the free ride ends for K-Fed, who took the title of "America's Most Hated" too close to heart, embarrassing himself along the painful road to impending bankruptcy. With a rock-solid prenuptial agreement, and Spears requesting that Federline pay for his own attorneys, she's likely to get the kids, the house and the cars. She won't, however, be able to get the one thing she lost when she married him: her dignity.

It was no surprise that American sweethearts Reese Witherspoon and Ryan Phillipe's divorce planted itself on the cover of every celebrity glossy last week. Reports indicate that Witherspoon used her "Legally Blonde" skills and found incriminating e-mails on Phillipe's Blackberry the night of the "Flags of Our Fathers" premiere. Although it must have been tempting to toss out an "I know what you did last summer" comment, Witherspoon managed to resist. Apparently, Phillipe made a midlife-crisis move about 20 years too early, trading in his two-time baby mama for his 24-year-old Australian co-star. Already saddled with the image of an untalented pretty-boy riding his Oscar-winning wife coattails, Phillipe has now isolated his small fanbase by planting his flag in the wrong place.

Marriage problems aren't an immediate concern for Neil Patrick Harris. Better known as TV's "Doogie Howser," he gave into public speculation and revealed that he's gay, making his performance in "Harold and Kumar" even more out of character. The announcement comes on the heels of "Grey's Anatomy" actor, T.R. McKnight outing himself in response to rumors. And at this rate, even Paris Hilton is running out of people to sleep with.

"Survivor" contestant Reichen Lemkuhl said that these stars recently forced out of the closet had been "Lanced," in reference to his boyfriend, Lance Bass. Bass was outed earlier this year after pressure from blogger Perez Hilton. It's hard to make any jokes here without crossing the particularly thin line of offense, but you have to wonder if maybe he should have taken another term from the dictionary that didn't also mean "to pierce or open with a long wooden shaft."

It doesn't matter what your sexual orientation is: Everyone gets excited for any kind of celebrity sex tape. And especially one that might feature Hollywood goddess Scarlett Johansson. A website popped up recently, supposedly created by a crew member on a film set. He says that one of the sound personnel realized a buxom actress left her mic on when she entered a co-star's parked car and started, um, doing things to him. The two crew members recorded a 12-minute video and plan to shop it to distributors, but for now are keeping the actress's identity a secret. There's only one clue on the website: a red (perhaps scarlet) "A." The hint led to millions of drooling boys hoping Johansson had followed in the footsteps of Pamela Anderson. And with a history of public acts of indecency, including a post-Oscar tryst with Benicio Del Toro in a hotel elevator, it's easy to anticipate a role that won't require any lines to remember. Some, however, believe that the actress in question is Demi Moore, who starred in the film adaptation of "The Scarlet Letter." If so, look for the dentures on the dashboard.

- Mmm, dentures. Reach Mattoo at mattoop@umich.edu.