Published December 1, 2005
By Batman
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Besides the fact that it looks so good stuffed into my utility belt, the Blue Book is the preferred tool for executing the foulest villain in our fair city: finals.
What matters isn't what you've got to say during your exams, it's the manner in which you present them. You can either have a loose, sloppy amalgamation of your ideas slapped together on poorly ruled slices of paper or you can compose yourself, carry out the form of your thoughts and present yourself with some valor.
Put it in a Blue Book, play by the rules.
Superman will tell you to be independent, to express yourself in the way that mirrors the wild personal nature of your thoughts. He'll tell you to put it down anyway you want it. I'm here to tell you that you're right to doubt him. Blue Books are the only way a teacher will take your work seriously. Writing inside the lines (both literally and metaphorically) keeps you honest, productive and professional.
This is finals, there's no time to be an amateur.
Now get out of the Bat Cave.
By Superman
Bruce, Bruce, Bruce. I mean, I know I'm No. 1 in the hearts of America and the number one superhero, but you make it too easy. You don't want to be the best. You're happy being "numero two" (as in the words of good friend and anchorman Brian Fantana). You're openly admitting to slacking off on something that isn't hard.
Having a paper instead of a blue book is great. One, you can finish it early and leave for Christmas break sooner. Yeah, that means more holiday parties and more embarrassing hookups, booyah. Two, GSIs will look at one of your drafts and thereby tell you want to change to get an A. That's pretty easy.
On the Blue Book, all you're guaranteed is a sore hand. But you're probably use to that after years of bad luck, right Batman? Hi-yo!
You can be as original as baby Jesus, I don't care. All I know is that with a paper you can work on it more, get help from a GSI (the person who grades it) and not have the pressure associated with 80 minutes of wide-lined torture.
Off to find Lois, catch you on the flipside people.
