Typically, Halloween costumes aren't my thing. The creativity and effort required is too much for a simple boy like me.

But this year, I struck gold. Saturday night, I dressed up as Charlie Weis - and I brought down the house.

Underneath a turtleneck and a Notre Dame student T-shirt I stuffed two pillows - one in the front, one in the back (in order to fully accentuate Weis's roundness). I walked around with a box of donuts, and periodically shoved them in my mouth, intentionally letting the powder sprinkle down onto my face and shirt. For anyone willing to listen, I used a white-board to diagram deep passing plays, insisting that "No one will expect it," and argued that the Fighting Irish should be a top-five team in the polls.

Put simply, I was a dead ringer for Notre Dame's vaunted football coach.

Want to be as cool as me? Searching for last-minute sports-related costume suggestions before the big Halloween parties? Look no further, I've got you covered.

Terrell Owens: Don a No. 81 Cowboys jersey. Fill a few prescription drug bottles with tic-tacs and down them periodically. Stand by the keg and scream at the keg-master to fill your cup before anyone else's. Sulk and whine if he ignores you.

The Michigan hockey team: Go to two parties. Live it up at the first one, then mill about and act like you don't know why you're at the second.

The NHL: Sit by yourself in the corner. Nobody cares about you.

Any Big Ten quarterback who's played Michigan: Stumble around aimlessly. Paint on a black eye. Limp around with crutches. Liberally apply fake blood.

Larry Harrison: Dress up in a Michigan football jersey. Don't wear pants. Run from the cops.

Kenny Rogers: Wipe pine tar on your left hand. Physically assault any person you see taking photographs.

Joe Buck (if you want to do a tandem costume, the same instructions apply for Tim McCarver): Wear a suit. Follow random people, pointing out obvious things as if they required a Ph.D. to figure out. Act smug.

Michigan football fan: Arrive late, if you show up at all. Leave early. Don't make any noise, besides talking on your cellphone.

Jim Tressel: Obviously, wear scarlet and grey and a sweater-vest. Tote around wine coolers. Approach people who look like good athletes, slipping fake-$100 bills in their pockets. Smile snarkily.

Maurice Clarett: Buy the standard orange jump-suit and handcuff costume at any Halloween store.

Tommy Amaker: Wear a blazer over a Michigan polo shirt. Constantly twirl your finger over your head. Start every phrase with "Well, obviously" or "Well, certainly."

Joe Paterno: Hike up your pants, wear a Penn State windbreaker and huge glasses. Pace the house from side to side, mumbling to yourself. Occasionally sprint to the bathroom.

Isiah Thomas: Dress up in a finely tailored suit and smile frequently. Call the cops in a thinly veiled effort to ruin the party permanently. If the party shows signs of reassembling, call the cops again. Repeat as often as necessary.

- Singer would love to hear about sports-related Halloween costumes and will post your suggestions on the Michigan Daily sports blog. He can be reached at mattsing@umich.edu.