This year’s Spring Game left more
than a little bit to be desired. After watching players go through
the motions for about two hours, a more accurate name would have
been the Spring Light Scrimmage. Leaving the field afterward, I
thought about how I hadn’t felt so disappointed since I saw
my grades on Wolverine Access after fall semester. Sure, it was
good to see how Matt Gutierrez had developed since last year, or
who might be the first-string running back. And I enjoyed watching
Ryan Mundy absolutely drill David Underwood in a game where there
wasn’t supposed to be any tackling. But I couldn’t help
but feel like I was viewing a practice that I had no business
watching.

Heading in, I thought the Spring Game was supposed to be fun.
And I still think that the game — and the event as a whole
— should be more entertaining than it is, even if
that’s not necessarily the intent. There are just six home
games this year — the team played seven each of the past two
years. And since tickets to Michigan games are so expensive and in
such short supply, it would be great for the team to give something
back to the fans by putting on a free show people would want to see
in the spring, instead of just holding an open practice.

Maybe it’s because I was in the press box and
couldn’t hear the crowd too well. Or maybe it’s just
because the crowd didn’t make much noise. It’s hard to
tell. But I’ll tell you one thing: The sight of just 18,000
fans in the Big House was eerie, and putting on a better show
before the Spring Game would quickly boost that attendance
figure.

Right now, the Spring Game is an event where people turn to the
person next to them and ask if it’s over yet. Here’s
how I would turn it into a festivity that the entire campus would
want to watch.

Allow tackling

I know that seeing a player go down with a serious injury in
something as meaningless as the Spring Game would make Lloyd Carr
squirm, but the glorified version of one-hand touch which we saw on
Saturday — instead of tackling — is just plain boring
to watch. Underwood busted two big runs for about 80 total yards,
but how many more would he have ran for if he were allowed to break
a tackle with a stiff arm instead of being called down on the play?
It works the other way, too. Tackling would make the game more
exciting for the fans, as evidenced by the oohs and ahhs after
Mundy’s crack on Underwood.

Hold a skills competition before the game

Since the Spring Game should be geared toward the fans want to
watch, I say the event should parallel some of the best events in
sports: the all-star extravaganzas. The dunk contest, home run
derby, NHL skills, quarterback challenge — these are some of
the most entertaining events in each respective sport, excluding
the playoffs. Why not try out a mini Michigan football skills
competition before the Spring Game instead of the usual drills?

I’d love to see who on the team can kick the longest field
goal. Would it be Garret Rivas, Troy Neinberg or Phillip Brabbs? Or
would it be a non-kicker? How long would it be? What about setting
up a few targets to see whether Gutierrez, Clayton Richard, Spencer
Brinton or Jermaine Gonzales (a receiver who came into Michigan as
a quarterback) could hit the most? Maybe an obstacle course for the
linemen. They’d all be great.

For that matter, I’d love to see them bring in some other
sports. Wheeling a basketball hoop out onto the field to pit Marlin
Jackson vs. Braylon Edwards in a dunk contest could be as good as
Jordan vs. Dominique for a Michigan fan — especially since
rumor has it that Braylon’s been dunking from the free-throw
line at the CCRB. I bet students would pay to see this, let alone
come for free.

All these ideas go along the lines of playing to the fans. Teams
are allowed 15 practices during the spring, with the 15th being
Saturday’s Spring Game. Are you trying to tell me that
14-and-a-half practices — 14 regular ones and then some fun
before the 15th, the Spring Game — wouldn’t accomplish
the same thing? If the team spent half of Saturday’s practice
putting on a show for fans, there wouldn’t have been that
same feeling of disappointment after the game.

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