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Haley Goldberg: The two percent of celebrity dating

By Haley Goldberg, Daily Arts Writer
Published October 18, 2012

Jalena, Bennifer, Speidi, Brangelina, Bey-Z — no, these are not the names of newly born celebrity children, but the merged names for some of the many famous couples that fill our gossip magazines on the daily. More often than not, it seems the hottest celebrities are attracted to other celebrities, leading to a duo of hotness that earns its own name.

We all know how these couples start: meeting at a movie premiere, working on a film together, recording a duet in the studio. But first, let’s recognize the prime example of inter-celebrity dating: John Mayer. Mayer has had a long, public history of dating celebs, including Jessica Simpson, Jennifer Aniston, Taylor Swift (see her song “Dear John” to see how that ended). So when he moved to Montana to create his latest album, “Born and Raised,” I expected to see a changed man for the first time. A man who would find love in the wilderness, or at least a few miles from Hollywood’s epicenter. But no. Mayer has been spotted with the recently divorced Katy Perry around New York City, and tabloids are already calling them an on-again-off-again item. Really John? There was no one in Montana who struck your fancy? No body to call a “wonderland” there? You had to reach out to the latest celeb divorcee?

Among the millions of people in the world, I find it romantic to think that the paths we take will lead us to the ones we love. In unexpected and expected places, we will find them when we least anticipate it. Call it my “How I Met Your Mother” philosophy. Call it the effect of watching too many romantic comedies. But sticking with that theory, doesn’t it seem many celebrities are limiting themselves by dating only within the celebrity pool?

Maybe it has to do with the environments celebrities put themselves in. Always at galas, movie premieres and fashion shows, maybe their prime locations for falling in love happen to be in spaces inhabited predominantly by other well known faces. Maybe they can forge a connection through their celebrity status, something us mere mortals wouldn’t understand.

Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez — Jelena — might handle the public spotlight and having over half a million photos of them together online better. Celebrity status may serve as a building block for relationships. Finding someone who understands that lifestyle might be difficult, and having that hurdle already passed might make relationships easier.

But for some reason, I find joy in the underdog story: The Cinderella story where the non-celeb gets the celeb. For example, Matt Damon and his wife Luciana. The duo met at a bar in Miami, where Luciana was the bartender and Matt was in town filming his conjoined twin comedy “Stuck on You.” Eight years later and with four kids, Matt said on “Ellen” that they are happy as ever, and fate brought them together that night.

Or, take the oldest Jonas Brother, Kevin, and his wife Danielle, who met while the two were on separate vacations in the Bahamas in 2007. On the new E! show “Married to Jonas” — which chronicles their newlywed life à la Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey — Kevin’s normal in-laws from Jersey, including Danielle’s Italian father, have even become part of the picture. Let’s just hope this relationship turns out better than Jessica and Nick’s newlywed reality TV foray.

There are more than 300 million people in this country, and, according to an super-credible estimate from math genius Dark_Raven on a Yahoo! Answers forum, about 2.7 percent of the U.S. population is made up of celebrities. Maybe celebs are just mating within the 2 percent because that’s how relationships work. Connections might develop between people in the same environment simply because that is fate’s way of bringing them together. And maybe that’s why a Hollywood star connects with another Hollywood star. When it comes to the 2 percent, maybe Kanye and Kim are destined to be together.

But just to let us keep our Cinderella story fantasies, Kim should probably consider the next bartender who makes her a drink as a prospective husband. Give the 98 percent a chance to be the love of your life too.