Your southern bob distains me-
so I’ll ignore you.
I don’t need your business cards because I won an Oscar and
I have connections (to the sandwich-maker).
I know where to find 1969 prices,
and I can sustain myself on animation and vintage tops.
“Yeah, I crochet,”
but you don’t seem to notice that I’m not a golfer.
I’m a carpooling professor
and “I’m very social.”
I love lawsuits but ferns can kill me,
so don’t sell me any seeds.
I came because my curtainrod is falling,
but all you can offer me is a coupon for a corsage.
“Thanks”-but my samples have run out.